The Horror Fatale


The Best and Worst Horror Movies of 2008

Every blog everywhere is doing its best and worst list for the year. Guess what so am I. There were plenty of horror movies this year, mostly Hollywood remaking a bunch from other countries, and doing a piss poor job at it, but hey they tried. And, as any true horror fan knows, sometimes bad is downright, good. So here’s my worst and best, enjoy!
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The BAD

7.The Eye (Jessica Alba)
First off, I hate this chick, she has a terrible attitude and her acting is shit. So, I mostly watched this so I could have something to make fun of, and this film did not disappoint in this respect.

6.Pathology (Milo Ventimiglia, Alyssa Milano)
This one had potential, but they didn’t quite pull it off. I have a sneaking suspicion if Milo hadn’t been in this; it would have gone directly to DVD, where it belonged. They were so hoping some Heroes hype would rub off. It didn’t.

5.Shutter (Joshua Jackson)
This is a case of it should have remained Asian. Such a waste, Pacey is hot, but not hot enough to make this a hit. It blew, watch the original and ignore this remake.

4.The Strangers (Scott Speedman, Liv Tyler)
They had a freakin shotgun!

3.Cloverfield (Some nameless people)
I have no love for JJ Abrams, I feel about him, the way I do about Michael Bay. And you guys know how much I love Michael Bay. I got annoyed with this because it had no plot and again with the damn flashbacks. Just like Lost, this had that same smug vibe to it. It thought it was way more cleaver than it was. (Wow that sounds like me doesn’t it?)

2.The Happening (Mark Wahlberg)
Marky Mark’s furrowed brow and mouth breathing did nothing for this. M. Knight Shyamalan was doing meth when he wrote this, because if not, he needs to retire immediately because he has run out of ideas. Some killer trees, ok, what the hell?

1.Lost Boys 2: The Tribe (Corey Feldman, Corey Haim)
WTF? I HATE this movie even exists. No Hot Mug Shot (Kiefer) Sutherland. Fuck this movie!

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The Not BAD

7.The Cottage (Andy Serkis)
Horror comedy done right. This one from the UK is entertaining.
Teeth (nameless people)
Completely different, not scary per say, but the premise is down right disturbing. If you have an open mind, it’s enjoyable.

6.All the Boys Love Mandy Lane
This one is completely trite, the big twist has been done before but, you will enjoy watching it anyway.

5.Roque (Michael Vartan, Radha Mitchell)
I usually make fun of supersized animal killers, but for some reason this one didn’t annoy me. Perhaps it was Vartan, but it’s not terrible, they upped the ante a tad.

4.Inside (À l’intérieur)
The French are brining it, kiddies and this one does not disappoint. It’s a bloody mess. Don’t watch this if you’re pregnant. Seriously, don’t. You’ve been warned.

3.The Frontiers (Frontière)
Another good one from the French. This one proves rednecks live outside of the south, seriously. See it!

2.Let the Right One In (Låt den rätte komma in)
This one is great and it’s from Norway! Not overly bloody, but it takes the vampire concept and turns it into something else. It’s the thinking man’s vampire movie, ok maybe that’s a stretch, but it’s disturbing and the ending makes you question things, in a good way. See it!

1.The Orphanage (Orfanato, El)
An old fashioned ghost story done right! This is a really great one, not a whole lot or blood, but some good jump moments and the ending is worth it. SEE IT!

Worth mentioning: Otis, Rec, Funny Games (even though it is shot by shot of the original) and Midnight Meat Train.

Thoughts, groans, moans? What did I miss? Share your list.


3 Comments so far
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I liked Cloverfield – had a campy Godzilla feel and I am all about Godzilla. Liked The Happening just because I am a Green and it tickles me to think of Nature taken care of business.
I liked Batman – the Dark Night and all. I watched a lot of old movies and have extreme mommy brain so can not remember much that transpires three months previously….also saw Twilight and truthfully can not remember more. Kind of Sad that.

Comment by lilikaofthelake

I saw two of these: The Eye and Cloverfield.
Holy shit! They both totally sucked giant donkey dick.

It’s not easy being a horror fan.

Comment by Haunted

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