Side-Eye News: Norman Bates Lives

Chochise County Sheriff's OfficeTimothy Fattig, 34, was arrested on suspicion of negligent homicide after police in Arizona found the skeletal remains of his mother inside her home.

Fresh from the news of nutters, we present 34-year-old horror film-maker, Tim Fattig. Fattig was apparently so grief-stricken when his 68-year-old mother died, he decided to do a homage to horror classic Psycho by keeping her decomposing body in her house a full year after she passed away.

But wait, there’s more Fattig works for a horror movie production company in Tucson called Desert Scream Productions. Fun. When officials went to the mother’s house to do a welfare check they questioned our boy Tim and found the mother was indeed deceased. He stated to them when he initially found her dead he was so grief stricken he then decided to put Mums in the window of the Bates Motel. Ok, that’s not exactly what Fattig said, but close enough.

Now for the most crazy — Fattig and I have a mutual friend on Facebook. Side-eyes to me.

Thanks Barb!

Side-Eye News: Stupid, Stupid Kid

I weep for this kid’s poor parents. An unidentified 16-year-old boy from Chicago has been charged with residential burglary and cruelty to animals. Apparently he and his friends broke into a neighborhood home and stole a video game system, CD player, 30 video games, 30 DVDs, a BB gun, jewelry and a safe. The charge of cruelty came in when dumbass Einstein decided to poison the resident’s goldfish by dumping hot sauce, mustard, ketchup and spices into the fish tank.

When questioned by police as to why he decided to murder the fish the Rhodes Scholar said, wait for it… “I didn’t want to leave any witnesses.” Loves it! Lock him up for being dumb! Maybe he thought Seth Macfarlane had written him into an episode of American Dad. But, I’m leaning towards the partaking of some wacky tobacky gone wrong. Either way, side-eye.